Hello! I sincerely hate asking for help and I hate the current position I am in even worse. Never would I have ever imagined in my life that after 15 years of marriage and at the young age of 45 years old that I would become a widow and navigating this world all alone. I never would have dreamed that my kids would loose their dad at such a young age and NOTHING I could ever begin to explain could even come close to the devastating, debilitating, heart breaking and horrific pain me and my children have endured when he died a couple months ago. He was a ASE master mechanic and had his own shop in our back yard. He was the sole financial provider for our family.
I went to Walgreens to pick up my sons prescription medication and was gone no more then 30 mins. I arrived back home with lunch for my husband and I. I opened the door and my husband was sitting in his favorite recliner and I instantly knew something was not right. I threw down everything in my arms and ran over to him and discovered he was not breathing. I was screaming at the top of my lungs “HELP ME!! PLEASE HELP ME SOMEONE!” I grabbed my phone and called 911 screaming for help as I pulled him onto the floor to begin CPR. 911 assisted me in doing CPR until first responders arrived and took over. I moved out of the way with our 2 dogs and pulled my shirt over my eyes so I couldn’t watch him being worked on but I kept saying through loud sobs, “please keep trying. Please don’t stop. Please help him live. Please God” About 7 mins later I heard a female voice call my name and I already knew why she was calling me to come outside. I refused to go outside with her because I knew what it meant. The fire captain gently grabbed my arm and lead me outside to speak with the woman outside who asked me who she could call to be with me during this time. I didn’t have anyone. She then softly tells me that she is so sorry but he did not make it. From that moment a few months ago until right this very moment my life shattered and a huge part of me also died. I’ve struggled every second of every day ever since just to keep taking another breath. I would never want my kids to ever go through this again or I would have given up months ago and did what I had to, to join him.
With him being the sole provider it’s left me in a really tough spot. I used all of our savings on his cremation and memorial. I’ve taken out loans that are all past due to pay rent and utilities. I’ve taken out title loans on both cars that are also past due to pay back the personal loans. It’s a never ending cycle of robbing Peter to pay Paul is how I feel. If I was able to get my rent paid on time for just one month and/or one of the title loans paid to current, it would give me a moment to breathe for a second and get my footing so I can figure out what I am going to do moving forward. It’s hard to do anything when I am constantly frantic about my car being repossessed, my family being homeless, having no water or electricity. I am too stressed to allow myself the time to grieve. Any help at all, I would be forever grateful. I am grateful for anyone taking the time to read my request. I hope you and your family recieve all the blessings you deserve for helping others. Thank you.
- Listing ID: 10428
- My City: Tucson